Spaghetti & Waffles?

When I’m eating spaghetti I pour on the sauce and it mixes in everywhere with noodles, but when I’m eating waffles the syrup stays neatly in the boxes. There’s an analogy that a woman’s brain is like spaghetti and a man's brain is like waffles. It is common that men categorize their thoughts. They are like a belgian waffle as each thing in their mind sections out into a different square or box. Some thoughts men might put in the square are family, football, and work. Meanwhile women are like spaghetti because their thoughts are all tangled as they constantly slide from one topic to another. Sometimes that’s why there is a disconnect when men and women try to help each other. Something could make perfect sense to her, but he’s working hard to shape those noodles into nice neat squares to help her deal with one thing at a time and add some order to her chaotic thinking. Of course, it’s not chaotic to her. It’s easy and natural. Along with this when in a problematic situation the way male and females handle it varys. Males want to find a solution to fix or solve, while females tend to ask, and communicate about the problem to understand things better.

Not all women’s brains are like this and not all men’s brains are like this. It just depends on who you are.

When talking about men and women's brains we see how they are wired differently as from an early age naturally start doing or inheriting different gender tendencies. It is an unforgettable time in the lives of parents. After nine months of waiting and anticipating they finally welcome their new little guy or girl to the family. Most people don’t realize that babies even in the first days of birth, girls' gaze will be fixed on their mothers or other people while the boys tend to focus more on objects around them.

Some common tendencies that females and males develop as children and later on in life are as follows:

Female	Male
Social	Physical
Social Violence, Agression	Violence, Aggression
Relation Orientation	Spatial Orientation
Language Earlier	Language Later
Communicate, Ask	Fix, Solve
More White Matter In The Brain	More Grey Matter In The Brain

If you were to observe a class of children there’s usually an obvious disconnect between them. Most times you will hear “Ew boys are gross” or vice versa “Ew girls are gross.” The girls gravitate toward the doll house and interact with the other girls socially as they begin making friends and forming relationships. This instant social connection helps them develop language earlier in life than males. The boys are usually off by themselves crashing toy trucks into things or shooting things. Boys tend to develop violent tendencies as they would rather tackle, punch or kick others. On the other hand girls as kids and in their teens are known for having more social violent tendencies as they use words to hurt others online or in person.

Has there ever been a time you’ve been in the car with a friend of the opposite sex or a significant other and you are trying to figure out how to get somewhere. When asked how to get to a destination a girl may describe what it is near or what landmarks you pass while guys give directions like turn right or left, or go to this street. This is because girls tend to have more relation orientation while guys have more spatial orientation.

So the question now is does gender/sex matter in the family? There’s been many differences listed between males and females, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have tendencies that the other gender has. After listing the aspects of female traits in my class (seen in the table up above) our teacher asked the females to raise their hand if they wanted these traits in a significant other. Someone who is social, relation oriented, can communicate and ask you things, and nurture you. All the girls raised their hands for each trait. In marriage you may not have these traits developed that your significant other has and that’s ok. That is the whole part of the journey as you grow and learn from each other to become equal partners. As people inherit these tendencies they are able to understand each other even when they are a different gender. We may have developed these things naturally or from others around us, but these gender tendencies shouldn’t define who we are as people.